The Love Between Us
by Fanficlov101
Summary: Kirito is struggling to accept the fact he's conquering floor after floor. His anger is then taken out on Asuna which threatens her life. WARNING: Suicidal and quite sexual.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! So this is my very first fanfiction on here and I'm really glad to be doing this.**

 **I was going to do Loveless but the ones I saw for SAO weren't really my style so I decided to write this. Please note odd paragraphs are from Kirito's perspective and the even ones from Asuna's unless I say so.**

Thanks and enjoy

Chapter One

 _November 6th 2022_

The day the game of death started.

I always put on the strong game face that showed off but, completing floor upon floor, my inner self was screaming.

 _Hide!_

 _Stop it!_

 _Your going to end up dead._

On the inside dead. But that was on the inside.

 _Asuna_ , I whispered to myself as I turned to face her cute face. You're the one who opened up my world.

I got up as I could feel sweat pouring down my forehead. I wondered how I got to this level, how I've lived this long.

"Kirito, you don't look so good," Asuna rubbed her eyes. "Are you okay?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'm okay," I really wasn't inside. "Asuna, can I tell you something?"

"If we're married you can tell me anything," she sat up abruptly. It looked as if she knew what I was going to say.

"Asuna, I need you. In the Virtual World, in real world." I choked back tears, I didn't want to seem weak.

"Kirito, what do you mean you need me? I'm always the-"

I stopped in her words as I walked to her and hugged her tight.

"Save me. I'm falling." At this point, I couldn't hold back tears. I let it all out. On Asuna's shoulder.

"If you're falling, I'm falling. If you're dying, I'm dying. We do everything together, leaving me is like leaving you," her soft words always made me seem small yet strong. I didn't want to speak. She got a hint that I didn't want to speak either.

"You know, there was a song my grandmother used to sing when I couldn't sleep. I can sing it but not as good as my grandmother." As she sang, it was like the whole world had stopped and it was only us. Like the stars and universe were dancing for just us.

 _Asuna, save me._


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I was very worried about Kirito. Not about his looks, not about his hygiene but his health. When I offered to take him hunting he would deny and say he was tired and when I got back I would hear screams of insanity. Yui, you're supposed to make sure we're okay, why do you abandon us now?

"Asuna?" Kirito was stepping out of our room, even though we were in a virtual reality game, I could still tell something was up.

"O-oh, Kirito, I thought you were asleep," I stammered as I thought if I said just one thing wrong, he would snap like a brittle branch.

"How could I sleep when I'm asleep somewhere else? But what are you cooking?"

"You've always had a great sense of smell. I haven't started yet but I thought we should have sushi with-"

"Green beans? Don't bother, I'm not hungry." This was insane! How could someone with such a powerful skill and big appetite not want to eat?

"Don't joke with me, look at your energy bar! At some point, it'll start affecting your-," I was like a habit of his to cut me off mid sentence.

"And who gives a damn!" He slammed his fist on the table stepping slowly towards me. "This world is crap your stuck in a big fat fricking loop of, guess what, LEVELS AND BOSSES!" My life was in danger. I was slowly pushed myself to the edge of the sofa.

"AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT?" Kirito was right in my face. I defended myself with my arms and curled up in a ball. "I THINK YOUR JUST A PIECE O-," he stopped. I was shaking all over and I felt like I was being choked. He must've saw the fear on my face and by my body actions.

"What is wrong with me? I'm sorry I just..." Kirito stretched his arm to hold me but took it back. "I'm going back to bed."

What the hell, I thought and I started crying. Who's taken him? Give him back! Give back Kirito! Give back...my husband. Not only did I have to save Kirito, I had to save myself.

 **Well, that was shorter than expected but good things come in small packages, right? Don't worry guys, I'm not going to kill anyone... I hope... I think. But anyway, please be aware that the next chapter will contain writings of self-harming and probably suicide attempts.**

 **Thanks for reading this far though.**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Some kind of husband I am, I say to myself. I can't even be classified as a husband or partner.

Husband my asshole, I said, random tears streaming down my face.

You wimp! Why are you crying? Asuna should be crying. I wiped my eyes and I was prepared to open the door but as I turned the door knob, Asuna gave a fearful gasp. I froze. Does she think I'm going to hurt her this time? I wouldn't blame her, I treated her like dirt. I just let it go and went back to bed.

"K-kirito?" I heard a small voice. Slight sounds woke me up these days. I need to buy some potions one of these days.

"Asuna..."

"Yes?"

I sat up using the tiredness in me to lift me up. "I'm hungry. Could you cook something?"

I saw a twinkle in her eyes as she smiled gleefully.

"Yes! Yes I will make food for you, Kirito!" It looked she'd won the lottery. She leaned in for a hug but my quick actions took it for an attack.

"Get off me!" I punched her in the stomach, making her stumble back a bit and drop to fall to the ground. Her HP dropped by 25%. She started crying and got on her knees and bowed.

"I'm sorry..." She said tearfully, not even knowing what she did.

"I'm just hungry, got that? Go make food," I sounded like I was talking to a slave. Asuna scrambled away still crying. Why did I cause pain onto others? I guess I just wanted some pain for myself. I crafted a small knife.

This helps, right? As I took the knife I scratched it along my thigh. Red pixels began to float and my HP dropped by 10.

"It hurts," I quietly whispered to myself, "like the pain I cause others."

I cut my arms and legs again and again until my bar turned yellow. I had a plan. A painful one, but a plan. I carved Asuna's name into my arm, spelling it aloud as I carved it.

A-s-u-n-a.

I dropped the knife wobbling.

No it wasn't enough, I thought.

I climbed to the roof of the house.

This was like it, I thought, I can finally face death and pain in the face.

"Kirito?" I heard Asuna say but I ignored her voice. She saw the open window and I looked up. I tilted forward to fall. I was ready right now.

"KIRITO!"


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

I was clinging onto Kirito's ankle as I felt his whole body shake.

"KIRITO-KUN, KIRITO-KUN!" I screamed but he just laughed.

"I might be physically strong but definitely not psychologically strong," I pulled him through the window.

As he sat there with hands in his head I asked him to look at me.

"Name," I asked sternly.

"Kirito," He smiled demonically.

"I'm not stupid. I mean your real life actual name"

"Kirigaya Kazuto," He said with no.

"Kirigaya Kazuto. I have-" I stopped. What was that on his arm. Was it...? No, it couldn't. I grabbed his arm. "What is this? Are you self harming?!" I traced each cut. Slowly and carefully.

"Yes I am. What are you going to do? Talk to me?" I was speechless. I stood up and turned to leave the room.

"No," I whispered, " I'm going to leave to think about what you're doing to me. To your friends and especially, yourself." I left the room to her him crying and talking to himself.

… **...**

"Morning, Kirito," I said walking into the room. I knew sleeping in our room would put my life on the edge so I slept in the living room, even though I wasted a lot of coal on keeping the living room warm.

"I've thought about it. And your right." He said. No good morning, no 'How are you', he just went straight to the point.

"I'm glad you've seen what you're doing to yourself," I turned to leave him to his own thing.

"I'm going to make it up to you, Asuna," He stood up and hugged me from the behind tight, maybe too tight.

"That's enough now. You can let go," I giggled. This was the Kirito I missed and the one I wanted for weeks. The good old Kirito. My good old husband. I was stuck in a fit of nostalgia until I felt something cold trailing up my jumper.

"I've always wanted to do this," Kirito whispered into my ear then started to nibble on it.

"W-what do you mean 'always wanted to do this'?" I stammered. I could feel one of his hands on the elastic part of my bra and the other stroking my behind.

"I'm not that weak," I pulled away from his grip but he grabbed my arm back.

"I think you're forgetting I'm one of the most strongest players on here."

 **Sorry I haven't posted in a while, I still have some homework to do. I'll try to post more often but I hope you enjoyed this.**


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